I test positive for herpes and I still feel hot AF.
I got herpes around 8 years ago…
…and I’m 99% sure it was from an ex boyfriend who didn’t know he carried it and then refused to get a blood test to confirm he had it because he “didn’t want to know” or take responsibility for it.
My first outbreak was one of the most physically painful experiences of my life. Plus it was coupled with the devastation + fear that my sex life was ruined forever. It felt like a lifetime sentence to be gross + shunned forever.
Fast forward to now ~ I feel next to no shame about it.
I always tell new lovers about it before any genital contact + in my 8 years of having it I haven’t passed it along to anyone else (to my knowledge).
While I wouldn’t have chosen to get it I actually see herpes as an ally to me in ways.
Herpes:
Shows up when I am tired + depleted, giving me the message that my body needs rest + relaxation
Asks me to get my diet + self care into alignment
Requires me to share a bit of my “ugliness” with new partners up front. I learn a TON about a person’s ability to meet me when I share about this
When folks receive the information with maturity + curiosity it’s a great sign on SO many levels
When people respond with fear + grossed out vibes it tells me that they’re not gonna be ready to hold me in my darkness and it’s a sign not to go deeper
Is just a skin condition. And it’s estimated that at least 2/3 of the population carry it in some form
I’m sharing about it here because even with herpes I feel HOT AF and I’m absolutely in love with my pussy.
I want you to know that if you have it I’m with you and you’ve got nothing to be ashamed of.
If you’re curious to know how I share about herpes with new lovers click HERE to watch my IG Live!
I’ll leave you with the potent reminder that whether you test positive for herpes or not, we ALL have things about our bodies and our selves that can feel vulnerable to share with another. Don’t let these things block you from feeling hot as fuck. You are SO worthy of connection and pleasure.
Need support to clear shame and feel like your sexiest self? I offer 1:1 sex and intimacy coaching ~ learn more!
Xoxo Julia
